you ready for this?

ok, this is going to be a random post. but my life is random so it should be like a normal post i guess....

so BIG news first.
I am newly
single.
I am completely heartbroken over it. I didn't ask for it, I didn't want it but apparently what i have to say and how i feel doesn't matter. so ya, i am quite angry over the whole shabang.
it will be a good diet i suppose.
i feel so sick about it.
i haven't eaten food for two days.
just kill me now.
....annnyways, this is not my whole blog post.
here's the good stuff.

so i like to wallow in my misery sometimes. i like to drown my feelings with alcohol.
so i found two of the boys on campus that are pretty cool and they have mopeds and they said that they would drive me and my roommate and we could chill at the beach with some beer.
well, we bought two six packs and went to this place near an old airport and we sat in the sand and on the lava rocks and we started drinking and talking and sharing stories. It's been a while since i've had a lot of beer. after one i was feeling a buzz but it was feeling good. i just kept going and going. eventually we ran out of beer. i had to pee a lot. i had to literally crawl across the rocks to get to a place to pee. i couldn't stand up. yes, this is sad, i know. i'm a lightweight. well i ended up hitting my forehead against the rocks and my back, that hurt. then we started talking about random shit. we were laughing so hard. it was great. after that i don't remember much. just that it was super dark and i couldn't see anything. and the lights from the city were spinning all over. one of the guys and one of the girls went to target to get more beer. so me and the other guy had some deep conversations about life and our pasts and relationships. i don't remember much of that either. anywho, we kept drinkin and chattin and laughing. i have been told that we talked a lot about sex and orgasms. i was even given some offers ha. but i was too drunk to even move. after we drank the rest of the beer we got on the mopeds to go to a good swimming hole. i was so drunk that the moped made me so sick. when we stopped, i barfed everywhere. i felt a bit better. well then the gate to the swimming spot was locked. it's a really ritzy neighborhood with security and all. so we just hopped the fence. sounds easy, but it was not at all. then we all went skinny dipping. totally amazing to do in the ocean. well, while we were swimming around the security guard came by with his flashlight. we tried to not move but he saw our clothes on the beach and he had seen the security camera when we jumped the fence. he was pissed. he kept flashing us with his flashlight which was annoying since i was naked. he said the cops were coming but we knew he was lying. so we grabbed our clothes and left. i put my pants on without my undies. they were in my pocket. it was random. we laughed and laughed about it. then we went through the Wendy's drive thru on the moped and ate a few nuggets and drank lots of water. then we went home. my head was spinning so so so badly. i fell asleep in my clothes and when 5am came to get up for work, i wanted to die. my head killed all day. i'm so exhausted today but it was a blast!
i love having random adventures and thrills while in hawaii. i'll never regret this at all. i actually plan on doing it more times in lots of places.
i'm not going to let one stupid boy who made a stupid choice ruin my life.
it's his loss and i hope he realizes that someday and realizes that he shoulda just been honest with me.
he didn't need to make me feel like a piece of shit.

ugh.
ok, that's all.
i basically write these blogs just for me to remember about my times here in hawaii, not for others.
so ya, that's that.