sadness in my heart

This ADORKABLE boy has left me and gone home.
My heart is sad.
He's now thousands of miles away!
we have to skype....
yes, skype....
and that sucks.
I just want to kiss his adorable face, and smack his butt and cuddle.
I miss those times.
in 11 weeks and 4 days I will see him again.
He'll come to Idaho, I'll go to Washington.
Time is moving slowly.
ugggghhhhhh!
I'm gonna cry.

Derka

derka derka.
derka is the BEST word in the world.
instead of duh or ya or stupid, try derka.
it's catchy and people will think you're cool for using the word.


i should be folding my laundry but I'm not.
it's fucking hot outside.
i want to die.
not really.....
but i feel like i'm melting most times of the day.
i shiver a lot in the morning then by 9am i am melting.
hawaii is bi-polar.

wool, (another cool word to replace well)(try it)
2 days til we have 500 new students. max capacity for this campus.
it annoys me cuz it cuts into my time at lunch and makes me have to wait in lines....i'm impatient ok?
also means i have to be friendly and meet tons of new people.
ugh.

i am in love.
feels amazing!
we met here in hawaii.
here's a story for you.....
we volunteer on a campus doing work like in offices or landscape or kitchen work and so on...
we make no money but we get a place to stay and food. plus it's hawaii so you'd be dumb to not do it.
it's amazing.
well i work in the office, i do visas for international students. it's hard work and stresses me out, but in the future i will be able to get a high paying job in the real world.
we're only supposed to be able to stay for 3 months. well i was planning on staying for two. during the first month i got asked to stay til december...that's 6 months folks!
what a choice! i had a bf at home a small plan to go to school for dental.
well a few days passed and i hadn't commited yet, when i broke up with my bf.
best blessing of my life. loved the guy, but he was all wrong for me.
wish i had known sooner.
anywho, since that was gone i said yes! i'll stay 6 months. crazy idea!
so time passes and i meet this other guy. dark and tall and very charming.
D.J.
wool we fell hard for each other. he's even younger than me (he doesn't let me forget that either)
but i don't care.
we're crazy for each other!
BUT...
he leaves in one...ONE week!
:(
i want to cry.
he has to go home and work.
but we are going to hang the day after Christmas, he's coming to Idaho when i get home and then i'm driving to Washington where he lives.
soooooo crazy!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
he's adorable.

ha ha life is random...the first one is awful but has good memories...
the second one, i was drunk off wine. horrible wine.
the third, i was playing beer pong with the guys on the beach, but i was drinking full glasses of wine.
i got wasted, then the security guard called the cops on us. that's the 3rd time i've had the cops called on me. we outran them. kinda...we hid. we're awesome.

ummmmmmmmmm i could go on.
but i have to fold laundry.
and update my instagram
which is the coolest iphone app ever!
i'm addicted.

TEACH ME HOW TO DOUGIE!

welll.....

it's been like 6 years since i've blogged.
weird.
i'm sorry but i have a life.
ha.
well currently i'm dying my hair and dancing to spice girls...woot woot!

Hawaii is amazing!
my life is amazing!

basically i enjoy one of the prettiest places on earth everyday!
for free....
yup, it's the best.

i am in love.
i have a new man.
he's adorable.

yup, i'm a lucky girl.
i could say so much about the past like 2 months! so much has happened. i feel like everyday my life is a movie. i've changed in so many ways and had so much fun!
i am blessed.

my room mate moved back home...now i have my own room. it can be lonesome but i like it. i miss my roomie!!!!

her last night here we got shitfaced. big time.
danced our asses off and had a blast!
ahhhhhh i want that again!

we were called the Sweet Booty Club since i have a sweet booty and got us all together as pals.

now it's down to us two.
lame.
but i like him so i'll be ok.


ummmm well i gotta finish the hair dye...
peace out,
i'll try to blog more often.
i'll try.

you ready for this?

ok, this is going to be a random post. but my life is random so it should be like a normal post i guess....

so BIG news first.
I am newly
single.
I am completely heartbroken over it. I didn't ask for it, I didn't want it but apparently what i have to say and how i feel doesn't matter. so ya, i am quite angry over the whole shabang.
it will be a good diet i suppose.
i feel so sick about it.
i haven't eaten food for two days.
just kill me now.
....annnyways, this is not my whole blog post.
here's the good stuff.

so i like to wallow in my misery sometimes. i like to drown my feelings with alcohol.
so i found two of the boys on campus that are pretty cool and they have mopeds and they said that they would drive me and my roommate and we could chill at the beach with some beer.
well, we bought two six packs and went to this place near an old airport and we sat in the sand and on the lava rocks and we started drinking and talking and sharing stories. It's been a while since i've had a lot of beer. after one i was feeling a buzz but it was feeling good. i just kept going and going. eventually we ran out of beer. i had to pee a lot. i had to literally crawl across the rocks to get to a place to pee. i couldn't stand up. yes, this is sad, i know. i'm a lightweight. well i ended up hitting my forehead against the rocks and my back, that hurt. then we started talking about random shit. we were laughing so hard. it was great. after that i don't remember much. just that it was super dark and i couldn't see anything. and the lights from the city were spinning all over. one of the guys and one of the girls went to target to get more beer. so me and the other guy had some deep conversations about life and our pasts and relationships. i don't remember much of that either. anywho, we kept drinkin and chattin and laughing. i have been told that we talked a lot about sex and orgasms. i was even given some offers ha. but i was too drunk to even move. after we drank the rest of the beer we got on the mopeds to go to a good swimming hole. i was so drunk that the moped made me so sick. when we stopped, i barfed everywhere. i felt a bit better. well then the gate to the swimming spot was locked. it's a really ritzy neighborhood with security and all. so we just hopped the fence. sounds easy, but it was not at all. then we all went skinny dipping. totally amazing to do in the ocean. well, while we were swimming around the security guard came by with his flashlight. we tried to not move but he saw our clothes on the beach and he had seen the security camera when we jumped the fence. he was pissed. he kept flashing us with his flashlight which was annoying since i was naked. he said the cops were coming but we knew he was lying. so we grabbed our clothes and left. i put my pants on without my undies. they were in my pocket. it was random. we laughed and laughed about it. then we went through the Wendy's drive thru on the moped and ate a few nuggets and drank lots of water. then we went home. my head was spinning so so so badly. i fell asleep in my clothes and when 5am came to get up for work, i wanted to die. my head killed all day. i'm so exhausted today but it was a blast!
i love having random adventures and thrills while in hawaii. i'll never regret this at all. i actually plan on doing it more times in lots of places.
i'm not going to let one stupid boy who made a stupid choice ruin my life.
it's his loss and i hope he realizes that someday and realizes that he shoulda just been honest with me.
he didn't need to make me feel like a piece of shit.

ugh.
ok, that's all.
i basically write these blogs just for me to remember about my times here in hawaii, not for others.
so ya, that's that.

life. is. good.

i can't complain.

i love everything.

i'm very happy.

the end.

\m/ hang loose

i am probably the most tan i've ever been

& that's saying a lot.

i tan very easily

& i usually don't peel too bad.

i feel good when i'm tan.

hawaii has been good for me.

everything feels fresh

& i get a TON of exercise.

i just want to live here.

i like the people around me 

& i like what i'm doing usually.

except today i was dragging butt.

i didn't want to work at all.

i was so so so so tired from the 4th of july weekend.

we went NON stop.

moped riding, beaching it up, dance parties on the beach,

goodbye parties, turtle watching, trolly riding, snorkeling, & on & on.

it was fantastic. 

very fantastic.

& the fireworks were good.

i'll post some pics later.

i have a meeting to attend now. i just wanted to update ish.

Shaka \m/

shaka!

i can officially say that i don't really want to go home.

i am LOVING it here.

there are definitely pros and cons to being here.

i love everything that is going on right now

buuuuut 

what do i do?

continue to live an easy life and work with people all the time 

that just want to do missions around the world??

oooorrrr

go back home and become a dental assistant

and try to get a man for life and really really grow up??

the decision is hard for me.

really really hard.

ugh. i know. 

blah blah another person posting about their problems on their blog.

well, deal.

i have to organize my thoughts sometimes.

i really need to start taking more pictures of everyday life too.

i'm bad at that.

oh and start wearing sunblock.

i am so burnt.

it hurts to sit.

whenever i sit in my office chair 

my legs stick and i have to peel them off and it kills.

i whine a lot but i gotta learn i guess.

here is a random shot. it was raining hard

and i couldn't hear my music. 

these next shots are from our trip to South Point.

the most southern point of the United States.

I didn't jump. I'm too much of a wimp. 

It's about 40 feet. I just climbed down the rocks & swam.

Later I found out that the most sharks in the island are located there.

Good thing i didn't know that before i swam.

or i wouldn't have duh.

anywho, enjoy!

the sound of the rain makes it impossible to hear my music!!!!

ok,

my trip to Hawaii has been fantastic!

i have an awesome roommate, Breanna from Cali!

it's nice to have someone the

-same age

-fun

-speaks english

-likes the same things i do

-has a similar past so we relate

yup, it's a match made in heaven!

my time here has been fun this time.

i feel that last time was not as good cuz everyone was not as friendly.

i felt that they cared less.

& i see that now.

i had so much alone time before

& now i have zero 

the time change is killing me still.

4 hours doesn't seem much 

but at night i'm ready for bed at 8 since it's midnight at home

i already have a tan.

GO ME!

3 trips to the beach and random walking will do the trick

oh, & coconut oil.

ants are still attacking and they ate my animal crackers.

boo.

i got ziplock bags. hopefully that helps.

here are a few photos from my trip to the north shore. 

next saturday: south shore.

Made it to Hawaii and it's amazing once again. Things are a bit different and different people are here but it's been good so far. I am a tiny bit homesick and I miss not having a car.
Walking is good tho ha
The ants are bad and it's humid.
The water is kinda cold too.
Seems odd.
Oh well.
Ummmm I'm kinda sad to not be home.
I miss people Aka a man
Even tho there's some drama in that dept.
I just am craving a hug

Work here starts at 6 am
EVERY MORNING!!!!
I may die
We'll see how that works out.

creature

this tiny little creature makes me happy...

 issoku, the chinchilla

(even when she gives the stink eye)